Onward

I have accepted a job offer in New York. My first day is Sept. 5. I have figured out a sublet situation in Ditmas Park for my first month there. My last full day in Greensboro is the 31st. I have not been in Jersey or New York since I left two years ago.

As you can imagine, the main thing on my mind is I’m really regretting donating my snow boots to Goodwill last week.

It all happened rather quickly. I stepped down from my gig at EmberTribe (super cool company my friend T.J. co-founded) to dedicate myself to searching for a full-time job. I was looking mainly in NC but was open to other places, too.

Why? Well, the great thing about Greensboro is that wonderful people live here, you can live really cheaply, and there’s so much to do here (and if you don’t know what’s going on, you haven’t been reading Triad City Beat and you ought to fix that). The thing that isn’t happening here: jobs in what I want to do (communications, advocacy, policy, digital marketing). There are like, three agencies, one newspaper and a handful of nonprofits big enough to be able to hire, and everybody knows each other. Which can be good. But it’s also kind of like a TV sitcom in its 8th season where all the characters have run out of people to sleep with, ahem, How I Met Your Mother. Eventually you hit a dead end.

I love this city so much. I love my family and friends here. But I know I could live here forever and never do what I as an intense 20something know I was created to do right now. So it’s time to keep moving.

I’ve been pretty private about my life recently. Been slowly deleting people off of social media, haven’t thrown as many parties, stayed away from Facebook (mostly for political exhaustion reasons) and have generally attempted to orient myself away from spreading myself thin in order to win others’ approval and toward deepening into writing and caring for the people in my immediate circle when I do have the energy, all while allowing myself the space from church and old sadnesses necessary to live well right now. Space for dumping out my box of questions and inviting a few trusted people in, and not everyone. And not apologizing for that.

It’s been a time for a lot of questions. What is God’s love in relation to his world? Where is my place in that narrative? Can I trust my gut? Do I have to go to a church to follow Jesus? What’s on the other side of breaking my own rules? What will happen if I fail [insert literally anything here]?

 : The search has led me in good directions. The latest is the direction of New York.

Today has been a day of feelings. I said that already? Probably.

I’ll be lending my car to Becky’s boyfriend so they can continue their torrid love affair while he’s out of state, because I love a good cause. Also because Vanessa needs a home. And Becky will comfort me as I move into my sublet and stare at things contemplating change. (I love how old friends return to each other.)

The job. Oops. The whole reason I’m leaving. THE JOB. I’ll be working with Fresco News, a new-ish startup down on Broad St. It’s an app that connects citizen journalists to big media outlets like FOX, helping anyone sell photos and videos. Citizen journalism is an industry buzzword and usually means shady deals happening on Twitter DMs, where maxed-out journos scrape social media for photos they weren’t able to take in time. Fresco ensures pay and credit for the photographer. Yay, ethics!

I really think the app is on the cutting edge of where journalism is moving. It’s still as urgent and necessary as it used to be, but times are changing, and a local reporter can’t be in 5 places at once.

I’ll be a content manager, meaning, I’ll help facilitate dispatching journalists, writing clips to accompany photos, verifying that their photos aren’t nonsense, selling the photos to the media. It’ll be fast-paced work in a newsroom; my coworkers are likely to all be my age or younger than me.

So, yes, I am the person I make fun of. I am moving to Brooklyn to work for an app startup. Somehow, I do not hate myself for this.

I chatted with the person I’m subletting from — a good egg from Trinity Grace Park Slope who’s leaving me her futon and is incredibly kind. I’ll see Rachel and spend the night at the Boetel (Elia and Dan’s) on my way up. So there will be familiar people and faces. I’m tempted to stop in Metuchen for lunch at Antonio’s on the way. I’ve been craving that pizza for two whole years.

My mom on the phone today, because, as soon as I got the offer I called my mom, duh, told me not to get overwhelmed. She was right: I have a great, if scattered, network around the city, and in so many ways I am going home. Old homeschool friends, older Queens friends, possibly even some Grovers? And I remember all my favorite places, and take comfort in how I’m headed into a good living situation and a fascinating, challenging job, and relax.

Then again, it’s only been since 2pm that I formally accepted this job. Saturday night since the offer. Little bit of shock still.

Oh: Anthony and I are still together, nothing there’s changed. We’re writers, so we’ll do letters. It’ll be harder than having him down the road, sure. He’s worth a thousand stamps and Skype calls. That’s all I have to say about that.

 :

Hmm, let me think about other housecleaning. Oh yeah. Basically, I look like a deer in headlights right now, plus a messy bun and sweats. A deer with a messy bun. I’m insanely overwhelmed and excited and heartsore and expectant. And I can’t do this all by myself. I expect life back in the city will knock the wind out of me.

Greensboro fam: I would love to make sure I can say goodbyes. I have to run around figuring out how to forward my mail for the fortieth time in three years and pack and give away stuff and clean and fix up my car for the haul. I’d be thrilled to have any guests over before the 31st to hang out while I fold things. ALSO: If you have small boxes/tubs for books and clothes, or are looking to sell a rooftop carrier, hit me up please! And, duh, if you want to buy me beer or lunch I will 100% shamelessly profit off of my departure so. That. Heh.

Jersey/NYC friends and fam: Let’s do lunch! Slash it will be so good to be in the neighborhood again! I’ll be working a newsroom schedule, so, some nights, but I’ll be down for whatever when I can. Also: If you know anyone who needs a roommate in Lower Manhattan or Brooklyn starting Oct. 1 RUN don’t walk toward the nearest exit and please text me.

Anyone else: Once I am out of my sublet and have a more permanent living situation lined up, you are SO welcome to come visit, especially if you need a place to stay for job interviews or have never been to New York. FYI: I will never take you to the hot dumpster fire that is Times Square so please don’t ask.

OK, I’m going to go keep freaking out. I also think I forgot to eat dinner? I’m going to go do that. Oh Lord. It’s 1am, isn’t it. Well.

.:

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5 Comments Add yours

  1. Mimi says:

    Yea..now we know someone in NYC whom we/I can visit. Ever since Elite Airlines came into Vero I’ve wanted to fly to Newark in one of their 20+ passenger jets. It flies out of Vero on Thursday, Friday and Sunday, so Fri to Sun sounds just right to visit a beloved granddaughter where quaint restaurants and off Broadway plays are, too. More later. Much love, Mimi

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Aunt Alice says:

    How exciting and hopeful!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Mary Ann Rutter says:

    And now I see from the two replies above, I definitely must leave a message here, essentially sealing a triumverate of support from your Mimi, Aunt, and Mama. Check. You’re good to go!
    (Absolutely ecstatic for you and love you).
    #thanksfortheshoutout

    Like

  4. Eleni Harrison says:

    Wow! I felt your excitement, wonder, hope and panic. You will be missed greatly and always have a place in Greensboro.

    Like

  5. jaysosocool says:

    I loved reading your life!

    J

    Like

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